Not at all immature or petty
In case you missed my Tweet about it a few weeks ago, the joint I intern for asked me to stay through the Summer. How flippin' amazing, right? So here's where I'd normally elaborate on the amazingness of this opportunity, but since I've been itching for the last four months to talk about the various people I intern with, the various peole that are now no longer there, I drew up some character profiles for them instead:
Alias assigned by Chelsi: Jared Jerome Deluca
Chose alias because: It reminds me of a ridiculous soap opera character who loves to order double ristretto venti non-fat organic chocolate extra hot brownie frappuccinos and refuses to wear anything but Dolce and Gabbana brand clothing.
Reason for Interning: Because he wanted to attach his name to a well-respected organization with the hope that it will boost his presence in the San Francisco Art world a thousand million points. What a chode.
Most prevalent article worn on body: These ridiculous skin-tight jeans
If he were a cartoon character: Gumby, with an industrial piercing and the hair ripped off the scalp of a so-cal "Bro"
Alias assigned by Chelsi: Margarita
Chose alias because: She is a headstrong Hispanic woman who really packs a punch with forwardness and demands most everything.
Reason for Interning: Because she wanted to balance her ridiculously boring and stressful non-profit paid job with a colorful, exciting and stressful non-profit un-paid job.
Most prevalent article worn on person: This gorgeous dirty green messenger bag covered in a fleur-de-lis pattern.
If she were a cartoon: Lisa from the Simpsons.
Alias assigned by Chelsi: Twinkle "Big Booty" Johnson
Chose alias because: He's a shiny, shiny jewel among lots of ugly pieces of coal. And he really does have a surprisingly large rumpus.
Reason for interning: I think perhaps his mother begged and pleaded with him to find something else to do with his time besides running around her house sprinkling fairy dust on everything while singing disco songs.
Reason to love him other than big booty: He bakes delicious cookies every day and brings them to work in a little basket attached to his bicycle.
Most prevalent article worn on person: A bright orange tie.
If he were a cartoon: The Road Runner. On speed.
Alias: Lola
Chose alias because: She is a cute little art kitten
Reason for interning: She's a hippie just looking for an excuse to surround herself in art stuff.
Most prevalent article worn on person: This big, droopy, very ridiculous, very
Reason she gets such a lenient profile: Because she stood in a corner with me at an opening and turned red from one glass of wine and aww, isn’t that just so cute?
If she were a cartoon: The pony in Strawberry Shortcake that’s too shy to talk, but always saves the day.