I have a confession to make: I’ve been following this chick on the net for a while now; I forgot how I found her, but I often look at her photos as she is an aspiring model and takes tons and tons. Something about the angles in her face is very striking, and, I mean, who doesn’t like to look at pretty things? I was taught in my psych 101 class that even babies are more likely to stare at people with symmetrical faces (symmetry being one of the main factors in what and whom we find attractive) but now I’m just digressing because I don’t want you to go, CHELSI IS A LESBIAN, CHELSI IS A LESBIAN!
Several months ago, said chick decided to only pose in what she considers to be very sophisticated clothing/settings, and she chopped her hair and removed all of her piercings as well. She claims it was proof of her becoming a more mature career woman, but to me I just got the feeling that she was trying too hard. Then she started to write all of these entries about how people need to start respecting her as an artist, and not make comments about how “FiZzOine” and “fOxAy” she is, but all the while I’m thinking, can someone in her position really demand that kind of respect? How is she even an artist?
Then I became even more confused/irritated when I read that she recently quit her full time job in order to “focus on her artistic career” and I seriously had to walk away from my computer when I discovered her .com because it had all this shit about the mystery that is She on it, and I’m still sitting here wondering, what career? What about posing for photos and blogging about where you go clubbing every weekend constitutes being an artist? The ironic part is that one, a fair amount of people follow her online profiles and comment on her meaningless rambling. Two, I still feel drawn to her web presence, even though it’s completely void of substance, and three, I felt a mild tinge of jealousy at the thought of someone so lame-sauce having the means to quit their job and survive solely on whatever they’re bringing in by promoting their own ego.
For the last week I was trying to figure out how to write about this little dilemma, and then last night I watched Factory Girl, a movie about Edie Sedgwick, Andy Warhol’s most famous muse. She became insanely popular for her roles in Warhol’s short films, but the kicker is that she had no real talent. The films were just footage of a day in Edie’s life, consisting of phone calls, deciding which outfits to wear, and blowing her inheritance on speed and methamphetamines. And the crowds went nuts! WTF, mate?
There’s this part in the movie where two of the characters are having a conversation about Edie’s career and Warhol’s work, and one character goes, “What is the message, besides Look at Me?” and I thought, bam, there’s my lead in to this entry.
Somehow, my interest in the mind-numbing aesthetic of pretty people (seemingly) devoid of substance has translated over to my own web space, which is a mouthful of words that basically mean: lately I’ve been worried about what people think about people who share their lives with the Internets. Ok, ok, I've been worried about what people are thinking about me and the parts of my life I choose to share on the Internets, and whether or not what I do share is coming off as relevant or meaninful.
I want to make it clear that I don’t keep this site because I want to be famous or adored. I write what I write here because, as silly as it may sound, it gives me a sense of accomplishment, and I honestly don’t think I could get along in the world without having some kind of outlet like this. And while the choice to make it public may seem like a cry for attention, I really just hope that through this medium I’m able communicate with people across the world who may be having the same kind of issues or thoughts. This is going to sound a little crazy, but after a long day of running around, working with people I have absolutely nothing in common with, and doing my daily hustle (not involving illegal activity), I love, love, love coming home and getting on my janky ass lap top and talking to all of you folks. For one, you can’t talk back (HA) and two, normally I'm confident that the people who continue to come back here are people who enjoy my point of view and hopefully, are inspired by it.
Here at GAS headquarters we’re going to make it a goal to take some comfort in the fact that the majority of the content here is text, so it’s unlikely that we're coming off as egotistical maniacs. And as for our unexplainable obsession with lame-sauce-look-at-me girl, we’ll just chalk it up to an aspect of the Human Condition (creepy voyeurism) and hope that our good sense will one day completely outweigh it (doubtful).