Two dozen and smellin like diamonds

Dear life,

Hey. Look, I know we’ve had our ups and downs and most of the time I curse you for torturing me and laughing at my expense, but I just wanted to say thank you from the bottom of my heart for the wonderful birthday I had yesterday.

When I realized I was turning twenty four on the twenty fourth in addition to it being my year in the Chinese zodiac, I felt obligated to plan something really grandiose and obnoxious. My first thought was Vegas, but sadly, those plans fell through a few months ago. And then I thought about having some kind of huge gathering in San Francisco but I wasn’t interested in another disaster dinner like on my twenty first when all my friends fought with each other at the restaurant and I somehow ended up sitting at the end of the table with cold fish and a new boyfriend that I was only hours away from traumatizing with my loud sobs and snotty nose. For a second I even considered having dinner at the restaurant where several of my friends work, but then I remembered that when I did that last year one of the girls HWMNBN messed around with behind my back was there and I just about died, especially when soon after that the guy I was rebounding with at the time showed up with presents and dessert like we were in a relationship or something, and that was the beginning of what I like to call: The Summer that Yielded Men Who Don’t Understand the Concept of Friends With Benefits and Go Total Bat Shit Crazy With the Desire to Commit. It wasn’t as awesome as it sounds.

So this year I woke up, got ready, sprayed on a little Armani perfume for added fanciness, and decided to just wing it. And what do you know? You RULED!

From the lovely morning around town I had with my brother, to the amazing sushi I ate at that little joint over in the Richmond district where I had an hour long conversation about how much I hate Oprah and Rachel Ray with people I’d just met, to the beers and chocolate chip cookies at a friend’s nearby apartment that followed, to the second sushi restaurant where I drank ten too many of those little cups of hot sake and got presents including a gumball machine and a mini bottle of Grey Goose vodka, to the tiny lounge where all the bartenders showered me with free drinks, to my other friend’s apartment where everyone sat with me on the couch while I watched a movie they’d put together for me of clips from a zillion previous party nights and tried not to bawl my eyes out, to the first real and thoughtful birthday present HWMNBN has ever given me in the entire three years that I’ve known him, to this morning, when I felt very much like puking my brains out but managed to sleep it off. All of it was wonderful. And let’s not forget all the text messages, emails and calls from friends and family, or any of the pre-celebrating I did, like the day before when I hung out at a brewery for four hours with close friends while a live acoustic band played music (including the birthday song for me!) and I drank apricot ale until I couldn’t stand it anymore.

I know that the chances of you going back to sucking leaky anus are ridiculously high, but right now, right this second, I have to admit that you can be pretty awesome. And if you could just stay that way from tomorrow until Sunday when I'm frolicking in L.A. I’d really appreciate it. Oh, and also, if you could somehow be easier on me when it comes to looking for a career, that would be GREAT. But now I’m probably pushing my luck, right?

Anyway, thanks again for the break and most of all, for reminding me how amazing the people I surround myself with truly are. Twenty four is going down in history as the Age of Awesomeness and Non-Sexual  Love. Seriously.

Love,

Chelsi