Hey Chelsi, you rock

The look of this picture here might lead you to believe that this is going to be a post about how I once starred in a set of amateur porn videos. Alas, my life's never been that interesting.

Actually, I just needed a picture of my 20-year-old self for a writing exercise, and this is the only one I could find on my travel computer (because I'm hanging out in Paris -- I lied before when I said my life wasn't that interesting). It was taken at a goodbye party for a dude I barely knew, and I wasn't even drunk, just rolling around on the floor with my best friend.

Anyway, a particular circuit of blogs I frequent is mostly made up of women in their thirties, and they've recently taken to writing letters to their 20-year-old selves. I'm only turning 26 this month, but I think officially being in my late twenties (GOD) is reason enough to start talking to myself. This is the age people start getting white hairs and  going crazy anyway, right?

(I fully expect to be one of those women who sends out invites to her fourth 25th birthday. Please tolerate it.)

Dear 20-year-old Chelsi,

Thank you:

For not drinking until you were (almost) of age. As it turns out,  drunk teenagers are the worst things on the whole entire planet.

For eating french fries at 2am and Easy Mac for breakfast. You haven't truly lived until you've had greasy carbs for every single meal, and there will be plenty of time for salad later in life.

For not taking yourself too seriously. If you had, you probably would've majored in something that guaranteed you a "safe" job with two weeks of vacation per year, an ergonomic set-up and a 401k. Meanwhile, your brains would be in the crevices between the keys on your keyboard.

For approaching most everything with reckless abandon---especially cooking and love. The Dalai Lama would be proud, and the times you're the most passionate are the times that will remain savory, vivid and meaningful in your memory. Even if they end in tears.

For reserving the right to change your mind.

For doing things that make you happy, simply because they make  you happy. You wouldn't believe how many people don't know how to do this.

For not dressing like a prostitute. You will look back on your pictures as the years fly by without regretting your fashion sense. Although, it's okay if you want to wear those tight jeans more often. Your ass is amazing.

And most importantly, thank you for being strong enough to survive a gut wrenching, soul crushing, pitch black and too fast ride into what at the time  felt like nothingness. If you hadn't, I wouldn't be here, now, realizing more and more every second that I am my own definition of a good person  That I am capable of so much more than I once thought.

Love, always love,

Chelsi